How to get everyone to say YES

We would all love it if everyone said yes when we asked for something, right? I know I personally adore the idea. However, most people think that to get everyone to say yes to sensible requests would require some sort of sorcery or manipulation. You need neither genie nor sleazy con-artist to get there, I promise!

We are all human; we form the requests in our mind, go over the question and it all sounds perfectly reasonable, yet there is still some apprehension on our part, mainly based on how we’ve imagined the person to be that we’re about to ask!  When it comes down to it, we all have the ability to negotiate and ask with the best of them – even when it comes to the naysayers in our lives.

The first step towards getting positive answers is to never ask for anything that you don’t genuinely expect people to say yes to. Sounds obvious right? Also sounds a little crazy. You see, I’ve always applied a simple rule in my business; never sell anything I wouldn’t buy myself. Then it becomes so much easier to get people to say yes.

Depending upon the situation, you can also pose the request as though the person would be helping you. Experts in psychology and communication have often pointed out that this method has proven especially effective when it comes to winning people over. It helps the person feel more invested in the request and generally more friendly to the idea.

People like feeling involved with what they do, as though they are playing an important role in a movie – you are the hero of your story, but they are the hero of theirs. Phrasing a request to make their ego feel as such is a step in the right direction. This isn’t manipulation, it’s human nature. Go back to my earlier point – never ask for anything you wouldn’t do yourself, never sell anything you wouldn’t buy yourself and never manipulate people.

Another rock solid and simple approach is to demonstrate to the person that you are speaking with that not only will they see benefits from saying yes, but those benefits will also be aligned to their own interests.

Let’s face it, we’re all human – being human means that most of us don’t have purely altruistic intentions all the time. If we commit to something, our interests will typically fall into how it could ultimately benefit us.

You don’t have to take the sleazy car salesman approach in doing it either. In fact, if you take the time to explain the benefits to their interests it shows that you respect them enough to make a personal approach and feel comfortable doing so. No one likes being asked for something by a person that they barely know.  However, if you spend the time to get to know the person you are wanting a yes from, you can guarantee much more positive results.

I have always found that the best way to get a yes from everyone is honesty and investment. A little psychology doesn’t hurt either, though I wouldn’t recommend implementing a full couch session. If you want to get that “yes”, take the time to make it mutually beneficial to both parties … and never, ever ask for a yes from someone if you would say no.

I’d love to know … How do you get a “yes” from people in your life?

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